... was what one listener rang in to say about the discussion of masturbation on Graham and Karen's BBC Radio Norfolk's morning show yesterday. But - surprisingly perhaps - this was the only negative response to what must be quite a provocative subject matter for morning radio.Martin Price from SinSin - his Norwich "love shop" - and I were on as guests to discuss Graham and Karen's choice
of subject matter. Martin's credentials are obvious; mine perhaps less so. I'm a self help writer, but more specifically I was part of the team who, back in the late 80s (or was it early 90s?) produced the pioneering Lovers' Guide videos, books etc. And my novel, Mr Mikey's Ladies, does draw on this experience and includes at least one scene of self-stimulation.Amazingly, we managed to avoid all smut and inuendo and, over the hour, had a pleasingly grown up and reasonable discussion about an activity that 99% of men and 93% of women say they practice. And, as we suggested, practice makes perfect. Martin made the point that if you don't know how your own body works and responds, how can you help another person to please you?
We emphasised that masturbation was normal, natural and even good for you; it keeps the sexual circuitry in order, releases tension, gets endorphins flowing and helps your sleep.
We also said that parents should be sensitive to their adolescent children's developing needs and that boys, perhaps especially, needed respect and privacy. We suggested that parents should be open and available, and always answer questions factually and honestly.
If anyone has any questions about "Lifestyle" issues of any kind, from work-life balance (which I'll be talking about on Radio Norfolk on Thursday 16th July) to... virtually anything, you can post a question in the form of a comment on the My Wonderful Life Advice blog - which either I or Annabel Shaw, my self help writing partner and social psychologist, will reply to.
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